Why are we all afraid of growing up or should i call it ageing?

Psalm 90:12 ” Teach us to number our days that we may gain a heart of wisdom…” NLT

I know when I was little girl I looked forward to the time i would afford my own dress, chocolates, choc kits, some level of independence and my own space. These thoughts would be mostly triggered by some scenes, for example, you are wearing that cute little dress and somebody shouts at you to change before you soil it with further threats not to buy you anymore. In my mind I’d be saying ‘one day i’ll buy my own.’ I remember one day telling my sister that my mother would have to sit on her ‘arm chairs’ during her visits to my house after we had a ‘misunderstanding’ over her chair. Well, my sister told mum and we still laugh over it now. Well, back then, growing up sounded like fun and in my own little mind, a free ticket to freedom, a land flowing with milk and honey.

Here I am now in adulthood. As I write this, I am 2 months away from my next birthday. I can safely say 40 is beckoning. Well,they say life begins at 40. The road to adulthood hasn’t all been that smooth.  I haven’t been able to afford a lot of things I had promised myself as a little girl, most of them are still in the pipeline. This is aggravated by the fact that, as an adult it becomes difficult to go back to your parents and ask for a cash boost in dry seasons, at least in our traditional African setting. I don’t know about other cultures but in ours, once you graduate you become the parent. Roles are reversed. Growing up comes with responsibilities, I didn’t imagine being burdened with the affairs of my extended family those times I wished I could skip stages but lo and behold. Say you get married in the process, there’s another family to take care of. That said, there’s a lot of things I love about growing up.

I do not miss those teenage days where life was easier going with the flow than not, they call it Peer Pressure. If you were a lone ranger like me you were labelled a weirdo. I shall not go into the details of the mischief of teenage-hood,  I’m just glad that before I could bow to pressure I found a man called Jesus and boy, did he change the direction of my life! Hold on, apparently those with a phobia for growing up are still stuck in their teenage years way into their 40s, 50s and so on, that’s why we hear of a state of mid life crisis. At least, that’s my interpretation, i stand to be corrected. My point is, I love being my age, its okay for me to be uncool. I can live my life and make independent choices. I have learnt from life’s bruises, punches and pleasures and that informs the next route to take. I am wiser and I believe, more beautiful, forget the weight. I look forward to being a mother-in-law one day and a yummy grand ma. In my world, growing up is bliss. I do not wish I was any yonger because what i failed to achieve yesterday , today gives me an opportunity to achieve!